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Always be respectful – of self and others


The intent of this post is to share that it is useful to always think well of oneself, and of others. That using self-deprecation, sarcasm, and being arrogant should be avoided; that one must always be respectful of oneself, and of others. And that living with this respectfulness for self and others, at all times, in thought, speech and action, is very useful and leads to happiness, health and achievement. If this can be, or is already being, practiced, then reading further might not be needed! This article is a detailed explanation on this topic of living with respect for oneself, and for others.


Using self-deprecation, sarcasm, and being arrogant should be avoided; One must always be respectful of oneself, and of others. Living with this respectfulness, for self and others, at all times, in thought, speech and action, is very useful.

Self-deprecation, Sarcasm, Arrogance and Respectfulness!

At first, the first three at least might seem to be different from one another. And “respectfulness” alone probably stands out. And yes, respectfulness is the most powerful and most useful of all of the above. However, Self-deprecation, Sarcasm, and Arrogance are all linked and related to one another, more than might be apparent.


There are many who use self-deprecation, by choice, or even as the standard for some among the many. Whether used by choice or otherwise, it is NOT useful. It goes against the very powerful and useful practice of “Loving and accepting self, exactly as one is!”


Many who have read my articles will find that there is a lot of focus on “Loving and accepting oneself exactly as one is” (The other aspect that is also a common thread in all my articles is “Choice.”) A very dear friend asked me “if I had a problem with self-love.” And whether that was the reason I focused so much on that aspect.


“Loving and accepting self as one is” becomes the starting point for truly useful personal growth (another article on this is already in the works on that.)

Loving and accepting self as one is” becomes the starting point for truly useful personal growth

What makes Self-deprecation not very useful? Some who use it say, it helps them “stay grounded,” or “not think too much of themselves, or not take themselves too seriously, or “guard against becoming arrogant.” One person even asked me, “Are you expecting me to be formal and structured even in the thinking I do about myself?”


Thoughts creates reality. Thoughts are formed by words. Past experiences, a whole host of factors, and finally, the words that one speaks to themselves creates their reality. This leads to how they perceive themselves, others and almost everything in their lives. So, self-talk, is a very important aspect of mental and emotional well-being. And “mental and emotional well-being” are completely connected to physical well-being. Research shows that people are not happy because they are healthy, and they are actually healthy because they are happy. And conversely, they are unhealthy because they are unhappy.

Self-talk, is a very important aspect of mental and emotional well-being. And “mental and emotional well-being” are completely connected to physical well-being.

The “Unconscious brain / mind” in everyone is something that a person is not conscious of. And that is precisely what gives it the name “Unconscious.” It is believed that in most cases the unconscious has about the maturity of a child of age 3, 4 or 5. The Unconscious is sometimes referred to as the “Inner Child.”


What matters is that the Unconscious or the Inner child, believes anything that is communicated to it as being truth. This is what is so unique about the unconscious. In any case, the unconscious is like a pure, all believing child. And it does not really understand humour, and that something could be said in jest. So, when one uses Self-deprecation, the unconscious believes the deprecation to be reflective of TRUTH. As a result that becomes what the person unconsciously believes to be true about themselves. Since self-deprecation is putting oneself down it is not useful.


So, when one uses Self-deprecation, the unconscious believes the deprecation to be reflective of TRUTH.


One might argue that the use of Self-deprecation prevents the growth of arrogance. In this situation, this self-deprecation is confused with respectfulness. Clearly, self-deprecation is NOT the same as respectfulness. Just like not being unhappy does not mean being happy! Not being unhappy is just that – not being unhappy. By no stretch of i